Parenting and pomegranates.

There is still no sign of morning light. It's early. Bent over the sink, my hands plunged in a bowl of icy water soaking a pomegranate. I look outside at the darkness and think to myself, I am NOT a morning person. But yet, here I am. Fingertips freezing in a bowl of water waiting for the skin on the pomegranate to come loose so I can release the seeds and gift them freedom to float.

My mind is already buzzing with important tasks for the day. Jewelry making. Blog writing. Ordering supplies. Searching for a VA. However, the seemingly simple task of releasing the seeds, this act of parenting, is what defines me in THIS moment.

I smile slightly as one rebellious seed flings itself out of the bowl. There's always one. I imagine the seed yelling FREEDOM as it flies across the sink only to land next to the butcher knife that is dripping with pomegranate juice, which makes my mind wander to some sick sort of Halloween movie. I laugh at my crazy mind and how easily it wanders. And then focus back on the last bit of pulp and seeds.

Lunch making. Will they actually even see it as an act of love? Do they just expect it? Does that really matter?

Motherhood. Parenting. It's full of stupid ridiculous tedious seemingly meaningless tasks. Voluntarily gifted to mostly clueless small human beings. But. These simple acts of love give me more fulfillment than any other task I have accomplished in life. I don't live for or through my children, but I certainly find great meaning in watching them grow and develop into adults.

I think now on my own mother and the sacrifices she made and the way she served me. The way she still does. It doesn't end does it? And honestly. Was I grateful for the many school lunches I took each and every day? Probably not. But I always knew how much she loved me.

So while the rest of my life is swirling in confusion and busyness and "important" decisions...for right now....I'm going to lean over the sink and free the pomegranate seeds. Then gently, lovingly pack them away in their lunch boxes. Hoping that maybe I'll cross their mind. But if not… That's OK too. In fact. I'm sure later I'll be met with attitude and piles of shoes and knives in the sink covered with peanut butter and a dishwasher that has yet to be emptied. This job of parenting? Not easy. But the fact that we are allowed to participate - that we are allowed to raise other human beings? THAT is a gift...even though some days it feels like seeding a pomegranate.

{{{My favorite method for seeding a pomegranate - watch this video}}}